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Trouble and Strife

He can't play
Quick putdowns
Trouble & strife
What a face

A wife of 40 should be like money
You should be able to change her for two of 20

I'm not saying my wife is fat
But when I carried her across the treshold I had to make two trips

I'm not saying my wife isn't good looking
But when she goes to the doctors he tells her to open her mouth and go "moooo"

My wife asked what it would take to make her look good
I said "About a mile"

Why do you want two weeks off to get married, you've only just had some time off
I didn't want to spoil my holiday

Whisper thos three little words that would makee my day
Go to hell

I've been asked to get married hundreds of times
Yes, but your parents don't count

If we get married do you think you'll be able to live on my income
Yes, but what will you live on ?

You can always spot my wife at a party
Look for two people talking, if one lools bored, then the other is my wife

Did the bride look beautiful.
She wore a lovely dress, I wonder when it will be in fashion again



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